we take our Sundays slow

Our bodies have a keen way of telling us we need to rest, and this morning my body was loudly exclaiming it was time to take it slow when it pulled the pillow over my head as Nathan's cry signaled it was time to get up.  A sick husband and baby meant this week was trying, and Nathan woke up was that cold that refuses to leave our house, so we ditched church to rejuvenate our souls.  A morning run in the fog always makes me giddy with delight, add in lots of playtime, "Martha Stewart" moments in kitchen, and teaching Nathan the beauty that is pumpkin pancakes, and our day was set to be amazingly blissful.  Everything was so good up until a little someone protested an afternoon for a whole three hours.  Luckily time ticks on, and so does letting go of our expectations for baby nap times and checking chores off of our lists.  Memories were made today that melted my mommy heart. 

nathan james: nine months

Well, folks, things just got real!  The above picture basically exemplifies life with Nathan lately.  He is one busy body, getting into everything, moving non-stop, drooling like crazy.  Let's just say that trying to take his monthly pictures poses as one very hard challenge by myself.  While holding him with one hand I snapped with the other, leaving me with a million pictures where only 5 were useable.  Don't forget about the fact that he started eating his monthly sticker while trying to take pictures as well.  

Growing// Our little man is 22lbs 2.7oz, and 27.5 inches tall.  His weight hasn't increased greatly, but that is mostly due to his activity level.  Poor guy is quite the shorty though.  Each night we highly encourage his legs to grow and take his pot belly with them.  He is growing like a weed in his gross motor development.  This month he has mastered this crawling and is rolling much more less.  He's also able to sit up on his own, and this weekend he showed us his latest trick...pulling himself up onto his feet!  Oh my goodness, we are in trouble!  He is moving all over the house and we've already rearranged quite a few things, but definitely need to baby proof a few areas he is highly intent on getting into.  Right now toys are far less interesting than everything else in the house.  Currently he prefers chewing on whatever shoes he can find lying around, eating Daddy's belts, and getting into the book shelf.  Daniel and I are still a bit dazed and confused on how quickly he became mobile.  

Eating & Sleeping// Nathan is now eating "table foods" like a champ.  Some new things introduced this month were yogurt, quinoa, peas, strawberries, chicken, and salmon.  We also started giving his oatmeal again in the mornings.  I know there are so many things he is able to have, but want to also be very mindful of feeding him whole foods from real ingredients.  His pincer grip is quite sophisticated, and he loves feeding himself veggie puffs anytime of the day.  The one item that is completely not allowed is eggs.  We tried scrambled egg yolk, and the poor babe's face turned very red.  

Sleeping is slowly starting to get better.  We went through a rough spout where he would scream at the top of his lungs when getting transferred to the crib.  He also continues to fight going to sleep so badly.  We are at the point where he has to go to bed by 6:30pm or he gets way too over tired and screams.  He is napping twice a day.  His morning nap is only 30-45 minutes long and his afternoon nap ranges from 1-3 hours.  We would love for him to get a bit more sleep during the day so going down at night is easier, but the question is how do we get him to actually go to sleep?!?!  He sleeps 12 hours at night, waking up once for a feeding.  I'm still nursing him at night, and very much enjoy that time with him, but also worry greatly that I'm creating a bad habit.  

Loving// Nathan loves to be active!  He loves climbing up mommy and daddy when they are sitting on the floor, trying to find new places in the house to get into, and testing his limits.  Bath time is the bomb dot com and his baby laughs just melt me.  When getting his diaper changed he has started covering his face with his pants and initiating "peek-a-boy".  It's basically the cutest thing in the whole wide world.  He loves clapping his hands together, singing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider", and his legs are always in motion.  

Loathing// Other than falling asleep, there's not much he doesn't like.  Car rides that are past his bed time are the worst, so we have to be very mindful of his schedule.  He also does not like to be left alone for a split second while I change over the laundry.  

one word check-in

It is a common practice in my life groups to do a "one word check-in" before we get going.  We go around and give a word to describe what we are coming with, or how our week is going so far.  I know it's coming all week long, and when it's time to actually give my word I'm always at a loss for words because there are numerous appropriate words in my head.  Well, this morning I planned to write a little update on how our life is going but one word just wouldn't get out of my head:

tired

I. am. so. tired. 

This new rhythm of life has been taking a while to adjust to.  Working along with being a wife and mom has been truly draining these last two weeks, and my emotions are all over the place.  But at this point I think that I'm so tired that my emotions are numbed out.  Yesterday as I was driving home I thought to myself, "If I could close my eyes right now I may never wake up".  Good thing that didn't happen!  And then I remembered the good ol' college days where I wondered how my body would ever get used to 5 hours of sleep while juggling classes, working, and life.  Miraculously, it did and I got through it.  When Nathan was an infant I remembered being so shocked at how quickly my body adapted to all of the interrupted sleep at night with his feedings.  I know that I'll adjust, we will adjust, and that I won't feel so incredibly tired one day.  That day might be when our kids are grown and off at college.  But I guess the beautiful thing in life is that it's worth being tired for.  This little family of mine, and memories we are making, and the love I have for them-it's worth it.  

However, the struggle is real.  It's a daily struggle between cleaning/cooking/chores and relaxing for a bit at night.  My husband must've known I so desperately needed him this week because he ended up having a random weekday off, sent Nathan to daycare for a bit, and cleaned the whole house.  

On Sunday Nathan's nap was a bit rough, and he ended up sleeping on me for an hour.  The internal struggle between putting him back in his crib so I could clean and plopping on the couch with him and watching an episode of Parenthood was so hard.  Fortunately, I chose the latter.  And look, the work still got done!  Nathan rarely sleeps on me, so I know that I have to savor those moments when they do happen.  I feel as though I have to base my self-worth on how clean and organized my house is, if my laundry is done, how healthy I'm cooking, or how many times I'm working out (more to come on that).  Daily I have to remind myself that these things do not state who I am as a person.  But it is a daily reminder I have to keep telling myself.  

I share this not to whine or complain because there are so many moms out there doing the exact same thing with more on their plate, more mouths to feed, more mess to pick up.  I share because this mama community has gotten me through life so far, and I want to add a little nugget of vulnerability and truth to where life is at.  I'm forever thankful for my "Mama Tribe" of moms, working or not, who are my backbone to finding balance in life, bring peace to chaos, and understanding in all these new baby unknowns.