a lovely productive weekend

Remember my little sweet and sour week?  Well, I'm so happy to finally be out of the funk and waking up with a smile on my face. 

Maybe all of the heat in Palm Springs helped me sweat it out.  

But I just feel so incredible happy, peaceful, content.  

This weekend was amazing, and there wasn't anything in particular that we did.  In fact, the Mr. had to work the whole weekend.  But I took some "Jamie time" and sanded and painted, and covered myself in paint, and sweated like crazy, and come Sunday night I was able to cross another item off my Summer Bucket List!  

I decided to be a little adventurous with our dining room table and paint it!  The table is white and the chairs are light blue.  It's not completely done, and I'm actually not that happy with the chair colors, but I think I'm going to work on them a bit more and see what happens.  

I searched high and low for a before picture and couldn't find a good one.  Our table was a hand-me-down from our great aunt.  I finally decided to just go for it and got to business on Saturday.  

This was my first ever project like this.  As I was doing it I felt like a true DIYer!  And, I was covered head to toe in forest green paint, primer, and blue paint!  

I promise to keep you updated once it is completely done!  I'm going to seal the table and am thinking about roughing up the edges of the chairs to see if that helps at all.  

Well, on Sunday after I painted all day I went to Target and Trader Joe's (my two favorite places) and they did not disappoint.  Some of my favorite purchases: a new planner, Bossypants, salmon, and kettle corn.  I was determined to make a scrumptious dinner, which I did (recipe coming tomorrow).  Then, as if I couldn't do any more in my day I decided to sweep and mop all of the floors to create a sparkly clean surface for the new table and chairs to inhabit.  And then-dessert!  Four little words: Chocolate Chip Zucchini Bread.  Heavenly!!  I think I finally sat down at 10pm, but didn't regret it one minute as I looked over at everything I had done throughout the day.  

On a completely separate and random side note, my friend handed over a beautiful zucchini to me.  One would ponder what all you could do with such a large zucchini.  Me?  Never!  In fact, I made three separate recipes from this one zucchini and will be sharing them tomorrow will you all! 

the secret of contentment

Yesterday I found myself at my pool, all by my lonesome self, reading.  As the hot sun blazed down on me and my sweaty palms fingered through the pages I found a sense of myself that had been missing.  Contentment.  I've never been one to just go places by myself, excluding the usual errands and such.  The pool is a place you go with friends or your husband, just like the beach.  Going by myself felt foreign and it made me uncomfortable to think about it.  But as I packed up my little pool bag and started walking to the pool, my self confidence started to perk up a bit.  It was like I was telling myself, "You can do this".  It seems rather silly, but when you find yourself with a lot of downtime at random hours of the day you just have to realize that there is no one there that will hold your hand and go with you to the pool.

And so I went to the pool, and I read, and I loved every minute of it.

I've realized in the past couple years that I am an anxiety-proned person.  On a scale from 1-10 I'd rate myself a 3-4 on most days, a 5-6 when school and work are in full force, and a 9 about three times a year.  In order to cope I've been taught to take more "self time".  It is just what it sounds like.  Time for yourself.  Whether that be reading a blog of my choosing, swinging at the park, getting a pedicure, or going to the pool all by myself to get lost in a book.

A verse that teaches about anxiety is Philippians 4:6
"do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."


This past week at church we had a guest speaker who spoke on contentment.  We read through Phil. 4:1-13, and God's word started jumping off the page at me, finally sinking in.   You see, verse 6 is good, but it always left me with HOW.  HOW am I not supposed to be anxious, God?  HOW will praying help me overcome it?

" I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity.11 Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.12 I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me."


As I actually read past verse 6 I realized that there was an example.  Paul had been brought low, he had been put in jail, and yet he found contentment.  I struggled through a week of car troubles and a bad attitude and was not content.  What was I missing?

Here are some of the big points that really struck me that I've been brought back to each day this week:

-living our lives comparing and competing leads me to believe that I'm not where I'm supposed to be


-live for the NOW, and let God shine in this moment and in this season, now what's to come


-contentment is an inner virtue, it is not contingent on what is happening in our lives and outside of us but what's going on in our heart 


-capture my thoughts and fix them on what is good, noble, and pure


-rejoice always, don't just count your blessings.  

Each day is a little story that makes up my life.  I can choose to look at where I'm not at, what I don't have, and what's not going right.  But when I do this, I'm not content and therefore anxious.  When I surrender each day and push myself to see the beauty in each day, my whole attitude changes and shifts.  There is a gift we are given each and every day, and I have found that I am often looking for the gift in the days to come and push today to the side.  Each day is a short story that makes up the bigger picture in life.

love and respect

On Saturday we had the joy and privilege of attendant the most beautiful wedding.  I love weddings, like, a lot.  Like how a kid loves playing with bouncy balls.  You see their eyes light up with joy and excitement, even if it is going to hit them smack dab in the middle of the face.  I love them.  

The couple that got married were close to us, the bride's older brother is mine and the Mr's best friend.  I've grown up with the family since I was in second grade.  To me it felt like my little sister got married.  Not only was the location, trinkets, and actual wedding itself absolutely stunning, what this ceremony symbolized left me feeling renewed.  Samuel and Hillary and I have many things in common, we started dating in high school, we broke up for a short time to figure out life, we waited until we got married, we were even married by the dame pastor and commonly refer to our premarital counseling binder as "The Beast" because it is so massive.

I'm a crier.  At any wedding I will shed some good ol' happy tears.  But as I was listening to our home pastor lead the wedding ceremony, the importance of marriage, the covenant it is, was something you don't hear often.  Even at this wedding one of our old college friends was asking "what's the point in getting married".  And as I was listening to the ceremony I began to think about my own marriage and how much we have grown in just three years.  I felt tears well up in my eyes not because of how beautiful the ceremony was but how beautiful marriage is, that God has blessed you with someone to spend your whole life with, to grow closer to Him with, to have a family with, be best friends with, and ultimately love one another in deeper ways than you thought imaginable.  

The pastor shared that the number one thing that ruins marriages is selfishness.  I let that sit with me for a bit, and realized that it all boils down to that.  It is so simple, yet so very true: selfishness.  We read the book Love and Respect before we got married and at the time it was something difficult for me to grasp and really envision.  I was a pretty independent person so understanding how my actions should look to show the Mr. I respect him was new for me.  However, I can write today that all I want now is to grow closer to my husband, run home to him rather than have a girls night out, and put more energy into him than myself.  I'm learning how to be selfless in my marriage, think of his needs and wants more than mine, and how to love him in his love language.  

I feel like I'm rambling now but my heart is just gushing at the seems with love and joy about marriage. It's something special!

{thankful vol. 20} morning quiet time

This morning I am thankful for a couple of things:

1) I am on vacation for the week!

2) This allows me to enjoy morning quiet times with God

3) God is always teaching me something new and challenging me

4) Oh, my new coffee mug always makes my mornings brighter :-)

I am a planner.  I know that I have said this so many times before, but this "planning" way of living has thus caused anxiety.  Lately I have found myself anxious about life.  It feels like we are in a holding pattern, waiting for my grad school to finish, and waiting for life to take us through to our next season.

I have done some amazing studies with even more amazing and beautiful women about the seasons of our lives, and although this has prepared me for what each season will bring it has also made me complacent.  This is because I feel like I have been in the same season for the past year.  It feels as though nothing has changed.  

However, the changes that I feel as though should be happening to us our outward symbols of achievement.  I read this quote by my favorite women's author, Lysa Terkeurst, "External achievement never equals internal acceptance".  Right now I find myself struggling to accept this season that God has put me in, to just live life right now as it is, and live it fully to His calling.  

Right now I feel like I'm waiting.  Waiting for grad school to be over.  Waiting for the right time to have a baby.  Waiting for a new season in our lives.  Waiting....  When I wait I deal with questions, wants, and worries.  

Yesterday morning I was reading Psalm 23 about David.  David had just been anointed King but then he was sent back to his fields to wait, and the place he had come from was the most unlikely of them all.  He was a shepard.  The following scriptures were from David's experience yet they touch me deeply:

"The Lord is my shepard; I shall not want.  He makes me lie down in green pastures.  He leads me beside still waters.  He restores my soul.  He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.  Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."  

Psalm 23:1-4 

Verse 4 was David approaching his fight against Goliath.  Can you imagine?  Coming up against Goliath, everyone believe that there is not way you can take him down, yet having faith instead of fear?    David chose to resist the temptation of discontentment by looking at the greater good of his waiting period.  He rested, reflected, and became restored so that when it was his time to become King he would be able to do what God had planned for him to do.

That is like me today.  I need to read more of God's word so that I am encouraged in this waiting time, reflect on what God is teaching me, be restored so that I can live each day to His purpose-not my own, and truly put my anxiety and worries into his hands.  

I hope this encourages you in some way today lovelies!

{thankful vol. 14} peace

Today marks the day that my loving husband and I have been married for three years.  

Warning: I got picture happy for this post...

And even though time goes by much too fast it is always a blessing to look back at where time has taken us.  Like Daniel's brother's wedding in 2007 where all I wished was to be his bride. 

Or the many trips he made to visit me up at college.  (You are lucky I'm revealing these pictures, all squishy nose and all!)

To the night he proposed.  Yes, those are fake eyelashes.  We had just come from a wedding I was a bridesmaid in, they just add to the dewey eye effect.

To the weekend we spent celebrating our engagement in Santa Barbara. 

To the dress that I will continue to love over and over again, the earrings my grandmother passed down to me, the anxiety that overcame me as I got ready.

To the tears of joy that overflowed as I walked down the aisle, knowing I was marrying to best friend and forever love.

To our first communion as husband and wife.

I've been thinking a lot about this past year of marriage.  Each year we always seem to tackle something big, whether it's finishing my credential, Daniel graduating college, landing my career job, buying our first car together, establishing long-lasting friendships....  

For some reason this year doesn't seem so big when I look back on those things.  We got through a year of graduate school, continued to plug along at our same jobs, and for the most part everything seemed to stay the same.  As I thought about this I was reminded about something I read recently in a book I'm going through right now.  Lysa Turkeurst writes in her book Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl:

"The world has made 'love' a dime-store word used to describe a feeling that can change with the wind.  The world's offering of joy, hope, and love is fleeting, temporary, and dangerously unstable"

"The peace that flows despite circumstances can only be found through Jesus being with us.  That's why Jesus phrased it the way He did, 'Peace be with you!'"

The things that I defined as successes in our marriage were mearly romanticized earthly treasures that are temporary and fleeting.  This year we gained a deeper sense of PEACE, not only about our marriage but about life.  This was the year of US.  We dived deeper into one another to create a stronger unit together, we challenged ourselves to be better for the other person, we became a selfless team.  This year has been one of my favorites because we have been able to truly enjoy one another, learn together, find new hobbies together, and have fun.  I wouldn't have been able to balance work, school, and life without the comfort of my hilarious husband offering up jokes to even me out and dish-duty to ease the stress.  It feels as though we can conquer anything because of how strong and connected we are together as a family.  

I am so extremely blessed to venture into more peaceful memories together with my forever love.

Happy Anniversary babe!

11.15.11

the sweetness from this week

Holy Smokes!  Where did the week go???  Being that I was traveling last weekend, this week went by very fast and was pretty stressful trying to get back into the swing of things.  There doesn't seem to be a lot going on, but as I look back at my pictures I can't believe how much filled up this week.  

First, I loved my early birthday present, a new iPhone!  I have been dying for one, and I only have amazing things to say!!!  I love how quickly the camera takes pictures, I'm in LOVE with Instragram (if you didn't already know), and I love how it connects directly to my Mac Book.  We have a very happy marriage, in deed!  

Here's some of the sweetness that filled my week:

Brussel Sprouts!!!!  I know, I'm a dork...but I LOVE them.  I made the easiest dinner: roasted brussels sprouts and zucchini, leftover rotisserie chicken from Costco, and frozen brown rice from Trader Joe's.  

Kale + Spinach + Pear Mango Smoothie

This smoothie was delicious!  You would think that it would have a pretty bitter taste with all of the greens, but it was actually pleasantly sweet.  I revised the recipe just a touch, and will post it soon.  I even bought a big bag of kale while at Trader Joe's yesterday so I can made some more this week.  They are perfect for breakfast when I need to eat something quick on my way to work.  

I cleaned the fridge!!!  The rest of the house may be a mess, but at least I accomplished my cleaning goal for Saturday!  

  

Making an amazing Pumpkin Streusel Coffee Cake recipe from the one and only, Mama Pea!  My in-laws came over for dinner Saturday night and everyone was raving about it.  I'm telling you, that Mama Pea has some pretty awesome recipes.  If you haven't tried them out yet, you're truly missing out! 

Seeing little miss Calli!  Any day is spectacular when she is in it : )  Uncle D was teaching her how to use the computer, or he was posing her while she was tuned out to Toy Story 3.  Who knows???

Apple picking and spending the day with this gem of a friend.  It had been way too long since we had hung out, so I loved our day together!  

And, making this adorable onesie!!!  My room mom made just had a little baby boy this past week, so I decided to make some cute onesies as a gift.  I took step-by-step pictures of this super simple project, so be on the lookout for that very soon!  

Wow!  What a productive and joyful week!  Can you believe that we are almost done with October???

it's the little things in life...

...that make crazy, stressful, and chaotic weeks seem not so bad.  

I love being able to find the little beauties amongst the rubble and chaos and focusing on all of the blessings God has brought me.

Like sharing a latte and pink lemonade over mine and Kylee's final hoorah before she left.  We went to the cutest cafe downtown and chowed down on none other than....CHEESE!  Oh, our love for cheese is indescribable.  

I got to spontaneously see this little bundle of joy this week!  It has felt like forever since Auntie J got a big hug and kiss from her adorable niece.  Uncle D filled in for a last minute baby sitting sesh so I was able to squeeze in some time after work and visit her.  Despite the blurry picture my heart was filled with warmth as she squeals "CHEESE" for the camera.  

Uncle D knows how to tucker her out!  We played ball, rode around in her little pink car, and then he decided to make her dizzy....that poor little thing.  

Getting the sweetest email from my amazing husband.  "You can do it, you always do and I am proud of everything you do. Don't give up on yourself and hang in there," That's just a snip it -I love how he believes in me and encourages me along the way. My favorite part was how he signed it:

D. R. La Fuze -The Luckiest Man Alive

Having the best mom come and help out in your class AND bring you an iced nonfat pumpkin spice latte...she knows me too well.  I swore I took a picture of it, but my phone must've decided it didn't like it because it is no where to be found.  Even though it has been 90 degrees here, we still find ways to make fall alive!  

  Starbucks really knows how to make that oatmeal!  I'm off to Arkansas for my little sister's wedding, and I was blessed by getting in the Starbucks line just in time.  When I left there were 20 people in line?!?!  

Things are about to get a little bit country over here!  Toodles!

in His time {encouraged}

Every morning my inbox is blessed by a beautiful devotional from Proverbs 31 Ministries.  Some days my days fly by and I can't read them until days later.  As I was talking and venting to my mom the other day she asked me, "Have you read the Proverbs 31 devotional from today yet? It is all about us!"  What I love about this is A) I got my mom connected to these devotionals last year and now she's passing them along to me and B) moms always know the words your soul need to hear.

Here is just a snippet from the devotional by Lynn Cowell:

“This is how the lampstand was made: It was made of hammered gold—from its base to its blossoms. The lampstand was made exactly like the pattern the LORD had shown Moses.” Numbers 8:4 (NIV)

"Perhaps you too are caught in the frenzy of trying to get everything done. Do you ever lay awake at night wondering if you’ll finish the tasks on your list? I want to encourage you to try something that has helped me. Tomorrow, before your feet hit the ground, tell the Lord: “This is Your day, not mine. Whatever You want me to do, I will do. Whatever You don’t want me to do, I won’t.”

Throughout the day, as your desire to get more done in less time moves in, and stress tries to take over, repeat your prayer. Soon you’ll discover that handing the details of your day over to God will lead you out of chaos and into His plans for peace and purpose in your life!"

Lately I have been feeling as though I'm fighting against what God has planned for me.  As my master's program plugs along I get less and less sleep, and I can't help but think when will it get better?  When will the juggling act of life settle down?  When can we move onto our next stage of life?  Last week I definitely faced the truth and got down to pray to God.  I prayed that God would bring me joy in this stage, I thanked Him for everything He has given us, I asked Him to show me how to serve Him in this day.  Truly giving each day up to Him, acknowledging that each day is a gift from God, and remembering that each day also has a purpose has made a profound difference.

I trucked along with the week and then the overwhelming feeling of life took over again.  My mom's words to go read the devotional was in the back of my head as well as hearing her tell me that we are always on the fast track for the next stage in life.  I have truly been encouraged to slow down, take each day at a time, and remember that the intricate details in my life have been mapped out by God.   

I'm absolutely in love with this!  It completely speaks to me and reminds me to enjoy this season and phase of our life.  

Today I met with a parent that is helping me train teachers at my school on a new reading assessment.  This is exactly what I am going to school for and I was completely in my element to work with her.  As we were discussing how our training will go and analyzed the elements of the assessment and how it relates to students' reading, I acknowledged God's plan.  Through my schooling I am absorbing and learning SO much!  And, it directly helps me job!  I left feeling filled with hope.  It was confirmation that God's plan is the right plan for me, right now.  

As I was driving to work this morning I was just swooning over how beautiful the clouds were.  I loved  seeing God's beauty open up before me.  I loved slowing down and looking at His beauty right now.  

a little bit of random

Things are about to be very random.  I feel as though there has been an extra spring in my step and I'm noticing all of the random things I am loving these past couple days.  

Brace yourselves, it's pretty random.

1. I bought a couple peaches at the farmer's market last Saturday and was a mix of feelings about them.  I have been dying for a juicy, sweet peach all summer long.  Each batch I bought at the store never satisfied that.  I'm also not the best at picking out fruit.  I was starving the other night while making dinner so I decided to cut it up and give it a shot.  

Delicious.  Sweet.  Amazing.  Indescribable.  It just goes to show how amazing fresh food tastes.  I'm so sad now that I only bought 2!

2. Thursday night I was able to finally get a run in.  When I put my shoes on, it was like my feet were saying "Thank You! We're tried of wearing heals and uncomfortable flats!!!"  As soon as I put them on, I got moving!  It reminded me why I love wearing work out clothes while running errands.  I move so much faster.

My body was so excited to get moving, too!  The air was crisp, the sky was filled with clouds, the sun was setting.  Conditions were perfect were running.  Plus, I had a lot to "unpack" on my run.  Boy, did I run!  It felt amazing!

It was a little shorter than I wanted, but the sun said "goodbye" sooner than I thought it would.  And, do you see that pace????  7:45?!?!  Well, the first mile was 9:01, the second was 8:51, and the last 1.25 miles was 7:45!  When I got home I just kept going....made dinner, cleaned the kitchen, started laundry, and then crashed!

3. The one thing that I can't keep craving during my spending freeze is a pumpkin spiced latte.  Come on, is it almost October so that I can finally go buy one????  Well, I found a recipe for an at-home version that I'm dying to get my hands on:

gotta love Pinterest!

Look for my attempts later this weekend!

And some other super random things about me currently:

-favorite Pandora station = Priscilla Ahn

-most beautiful thing I saw this week = the MOON!  It was spectacular!

-favorite Netflix obsession = Brothers & Sisters

-what I ate for breakfast this morning = a TJ wheat free waffle with almond butter and banana

-have my hopes about = "Up All Night", I fell in love with the pilot

-what I'm dreading = writing papers all weekend long :( and laundry...

my love

{source}

I stumbled upon this and it completely relates to what has been on my mind recently.  As I was talking with a friend of mine the other day, she gently reminded me the importance of loving who you are and being content with life.  The one person I have always been the most comfortable with and love who I am with is my husband.  

He loves me for who I am.

No matter how crazy I get, how over-scheduled I become, how messy my hair looks in the morning, how intense I get about exercising or eating healthy, how tired I am after work, how I talk in my "teacher voice", how I hog the covers, how I'm always up way earlier before him...he still loves me!

He is the most amazing man and continually allows me to find joy in life.  

Even when we bust a move on the dance floor...

Each day is a new adventure.  He shows me that no matter what worries are going on, they aren't worth wasting time over.  His positive outlook on life will always inspire me.

And, I love that he loves my cooking...even when I make him try some pretty crazy recipes!

 

love languages {encouraged}

Something happened yesterday morning that will forever change me.  The husband and I went on a coffee date in the wee hours to an adorable coffee shop in Encinitas.  Our coffee date was pretty ordinary, no big news was shared, I didn't shout, "I'm pregnant", no plans of moving were discussed.  However, we did participate in something big and it had to do with this book:

So many people have read this book, quote it, and love it.  My husband and I were given in during our premarital counseling.  However, we had to read so many books that this book didn't receive the attention it needed.  Lately, I have wanted to be loved but feel as though D doesn't know how to show it to me.  Also, I want to show D how much he means to me but my intentions aren't always effective.  So I did what I do best, and found a book to help!

I don't want to give the whole book away to you because you MUST read this!  The purpose is meeting each other's deep emotional need to feel loved.  Dr. Chapman has laid out five love languages that each of us have: words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.  When we know how our spouse wants to be loved, then we can more efficiently fill up their "love tank".  

So yesterday's coffee date included two lattes and scrumptious treat and diving into what our love languages are.

Husband: Words of Affirmation & Physical Touch

Me: Acts of Service & Quality Time

The fun part was trying to guess what each other's love language was!  Once we knew what our love languages were it all felt so easy.  We went back through the book to find out how to show love to the other person.  It was like an "aha!!!" moment for us!  As I was reading ways in which to show someone love using words of affirmation, D kept shaking his head acknowledging how much that would mean to him.  Then, we talked about how we already show our love and what the other appreciates more.  Surprisingly, the husband thought mine was gifts.  As much as I love the gifts, his acts of service mean so much more to me.  Knowing that he is laying aside his desires to do something for me makes me swoon.  

We even created a list of what we can do for the other person and created "love challenges".  For the next month I have to write down my words of affirmation to D every day and challenge myself to not use the same ones.  It is such a blessing to see God's work in our lives.  So many marriages around us have been struggling or crumbling into divorce.  As we read this book it amazes me how truthful it is.  When we feel loved, we feel fulfilled.  However, if someone isn't loving us in our love language it is almost futile.  

One idea I found at this AMAZING website is The Hint Box.  You make a box and put strips of paper inside.  Whenever you feel like dropping a hint of what your husband could do for you, surprise you with, etc. you write it on a strip of paper.  Then, when he wants to surprise you he can get an idea from the box.  When I mentioned this to the husband he smiled so wide.  He hates guessing what to do for me, and this idea already gives him ideas that are nice and simple.  This will be a new addition to our home this week!  

After our cute little coffee date, we both felt overwhelmed with God's love for us.  That He put each of us in each other's lives, has answered our prayers along the way, and has shown us how to love one another unconditionally.  Our coffee date will forever remain with me as I think of how to show love to my husband.